LIGHT?? SOLISTICE.

hha~

2007-03-01T22:54:00.000-08:00

veri long nv come in le. hha~ stress stress and more stress. wat more ish dere other than stress. shuo dao stress. wo stress others oso stress. sho ii don hab e right tuu be even stressed. ii don hab e right. ii'm sho sick and tired of tis kinda life. i'm reali sick of it. ii wana give up on my studies. wo fang qi. wo tou xiang. okiies. forget it. was in such a bad mood frm morn start. didn even tok. c evrybody diao. hha~ den a CBK scold my fwen. who's helped me sho much. step on her leg scold her stil diao somemore. ki siao. i forced myself to stay in class. nt to look her up. as i kena moi nanny scold liao. scold dao damn cham. all on ii was iiresponsible. ii diao tat cbk. she bo ji come look fer me herself. oni noe how to complain. in e end moi jie ask me forget it. cos she veri wei nan. great. hha~ heng ii damn tired of it liao. otherwise she die. ii went home alone. long tym nv done tat. and i was kinda hapi i am able to go home alone. reached home in 20 min. stil tio gan. mom gan. sis oso buay song. dad come back oso gan. and i was irresponsible again. when i actuali called home to tel. and permission was given. den i was forced to call sch. cal cal cal. ming ming jiu bu zai. ming ming jiu mei ren guan. i stil must cal. hha~ forget it. i'm reali sick of evrythin. abt wat happened ytd. wo bu shuo le. bu xiang rang dear cao xin. hao xiang nian ta. hao xiang jian ta. wo zhi xiang yao he ta zai yi qi. qi ta de.. she me dou wu suo wei. wo ma fan de ren gou duo le. wo bu xiang zai ma fan qi ta ren. cos i'm iresponsible. wo shi duo me chao ji de bu fu ze ren. jiu rang wo zuo wo xiang yao zuo de shi. hao bu hao.. wo kuai ben kui le. wo hai pa. wo kuai ben kui le.

lei

2007-01-10T07:27:00.000-08:00

11.30pm. wo zuo huaii haii zii zuo leii lerrss. xiianq zuo ge guaii haii zii.. guo guaii haii zii gai guo de shen huo~ few more hours tuu meetin dear. hao gao xiin.. haviin a happiier nite today.. :]

oops

2007-01-10T02:13:00.000-08:00

intend tuu go sch at 4 today. but in e end ii bu xing ren shi. if not fer lin's alarm. i dono wat tym i'll wake up. too tired?? mayb.. dear went tuu my hse dere at 4 too. shagua~ dan xin wo bei blangah chi lerrss. sis goin to watch deathnote today de. but dad ask her can postpone not.. ltr shang le wo de xin. at tat tym i was like tinkin.. gou duo shang hen le ah.. wats e matter wit jus a few more scratches.. doesn make any diff eh. i wanted sis to go. but she don wan le. and mom.. say i bu ting ta de hua. sis argue. if i bu ting i zao jiu pao diao le. ta yi jing zai ting le ni yao zen yang.. but mom say i zao ta zi ji. evryday 2, 3 am slp. 5 jiu go sch.. i slp wat. and all.. study wat, where got jing shen. slp in sch again ah. yea. but i reali got ting ke. i got study. i did my hw. jus cant chng my bad habits.. didn eat much for e whole day. i guessed ii lost moii smiiles , laughter and moii voice w/o dear being arnd. i cant expect him tuu come here evry mornin. i noe tat.. and its expected tat he'll not turn up sometimes. but e little hope deep inside stil made moii feel tat much disappointed. its alright anw.. :] zhe ge shagua. rode a puntured tyre tat made his leg hurt here. and go back aft he noe tat i'm fine. shagua~ bey he's disappointed tat i'm not downstairs. but more relieved tat i didn go down. pon class today. and kena koh find. heng my actin skills not bad. *victory sign. LOL. first and last tym lahhss. i'm a good gal.

i noe

2007-01-09T07:19:00.000-08:00

i jus overheard tat sis say dad tel her don go watch deathnote tml. " deng xia shang le wo de xin" haish~ wo yi jing gou duo shang hen le.. it doesn matter if ii get more. i don care. i und my daddy. i jus didn say much or tok abt it. it doesn mean i'm a blockhead or wat. she me dou bu dong. she me dou bu guan. mama stil feel tat wo zai fan kang. sis say.. ta yi jing zai ting ni de hua le. ni hai yao zen yang. ru guo ta fan kang de hua.. ta zai jiu tao zou le. hha* fucked up.. ii keep all inside. and i won speak a word..

zhe me ban

2007-01-08T23:40:00.000-08:00

today wasn a veri good day agaiin. e oni few minutes tat i truely feel tat i am myself ish in e mornin. i saw dear~ was reali reali hapi to c him. drink a cup of milo durin recess. and til now, 3.45pm. i'm eatin e oni muffin. didn quite feel like eatin till dinner. but he'll be angry if i didn do sho.. went to look for bel aft sch. i waited quite a long tym for her. i'm not givin me a face or wat. or showin attitude. but she got angry and say she hao hao wen wo got anythin to tel her. i mean i don hab anythin tat i feel like tellin her. she noes all. and i don feel like tokin. she confront me den stormed off. i went to e office upstairs and slept. b4 tat.. i wonder y. i cried. but fought back still.. i don wana cry. i'm angry at myself for tat. dad fetch me home. if not i gota stay till 5 again. jus get to noe tat he called my fwens. i was angry. i feel tat he gives my fwens no respect at all. and i didn noe he'll ring up dear too. yer predictions are right. he reali looked for euu. as i was readin yer blog.. tears swelled. but i couldn show tat i'm e slightest bit sad. e feelin sucks. evrythin bloated inside. i couldn cry or show anythin.. i'm goin to go crazy sooner or ltr. feel sho much like cryin my hart out. dad's here. popo's here. if i reali did.. i'm afraid i cant even use e com anymore. i'm feelin terrible dear~ i live for euu. now. i live for euu. i don c any reason i shall be myself except e fact tat u'll be sad. i wan euu to be hapi. but i cnt ask u to now.. i noe, i und. all i noe ish.. u're my life. i tink of euu sho much, afraid tat i might give up soon. mayb even return to my old self. i love euu. i don give a damn bout gals home stuff if i noe u're wit me. i reali don care. i'm serious dear~ i don wana leave u. especially right now. SHIT. i tink my eyes are red. no.. i cnt cry now. pls.. a while more. jus a while more. i'll hold back. but not now. bel hurt me.. dear hurt me too.. i dono wat tuu do. i reali dono.. i'm gona finish my small cake. don tink i'll be havin dinner. reali don feel like eatin. dui bu qi xianggong.. i love euu. and i promised too. tat i'll nv leave euu. i said it. and i won leave..

lost

2007-01-08T06:01:00.000-08:00

i hab alot tu say rite now. but my trail of tot was interupted by sis. she wana use e com. rite now ish 11.25pm. alot of tings happened recently. i'm startin tuu get tired, mentally. its been real long since i've been like tis. but as long as i noe dears arnd.. i guess all wil be okiies. i've been veri worried abt him, and ah gong. i wana hlp. i wana hlp sho much. jus wat can ii do?? i'm serioulsy willin tuu do anytin withiin my ability. inoe dear lost alot of energy le. can ii give euu all of mine?? how do ii do tat?? pls teachme how.. pls. i wan hlp ah gong oso. i wana visit him. haish~ dad and nmom came to sch today. dad toked to principle and my discipline head. ask wat documents must he sign to get me outa sch. oh.. e sch stuff again. moral of e story ish.. i stil am able to study wit e hlp frm teachers. dey don wan me to go.. sho now i hab to report to mr neo evryday immediately aft sch. sign in when i reach sch, and sign out at 5. sit dere alone rot.. i'm tired. i slept dere. i didn noe i drifted in to slp. all i saw was my dear. his image.. vividly. i saw, sho clearly. sho near yet sho far uh.. and when i'm awoken by mr neo.. i stil saw dear. but e first ting i open my eyes was e tot "where am i.. y am i here.. wat hab i been doin.. and den. oh.. i rmbed" took silver cab home. cost sho much. $6.30 can go pasir ris liao. but i don care. i can take cab lydat evryday and not eat. i don care. but my dear will be angry at me. lied on my bed and fell aslp again. when i woke up. its e same "where am i. wat hab i been doin.. y am i here. and oh.. i recalled again. oh ya~ i hab chicken rice jus now. i tried my veri best to finish it all. but stil left some though. i'm sowie dear~ i'm sho damn worried bout u. i wana hlp u out. pls allow me to.. i'm alright. i don give a damn bout wat happen to me okiies. i don mind. all i care for ish u and oni u. yer ah gong.. its 12 now. u're stil not home yet. jus try to slp pls.. don tire yrself out. it hurts me jus to c wat u're sayin.. but i'm real glad tat we're stil tgt despite all tis "obstacles??" probably.. wat ish a relationship if it cant even pull through obstacles.. but all tis ish abit too much for e both of us. i noe u're tired. i'm veri tired too. heavy. hen ai xiao de dabao. euu cant lose yer smiles and laughter okiies?? i noe its tough for u. don worri bout me. nth wil happen to me. i can handle em. HAO DAN XIN NI!!! haish. how long has it been tat i've toked and smiled at least. dear.. zhen de zhen de hao xiang ni. yin wei ni, wo cheng dao xian zai. yin wei ni.. wo jue de qi ta yi qie dou bu zhong yao. yin wei ni.. i'm stil arnd. for euu. i can feel jus how terrible u're feelin now. i'm sowie to not be able to hlp. sho pls teach me how.. don put up a tough front okiies.. hen xin ku de. don intend to slp today. don even tink i'll be able to get some slp. at most i go to sch earlier if dear not here again. 6 reach i oso don care.. haish~

ren shen jiu ru tong yi chang meng

ru meng chu xing hou

yi qie dou da hui yuan zhuang

ren shen jiu ru tong yi chang xi

ban yan zhe zhong zhong bo zhe

rang ren cheng zhang

dao di xian shi shi she me

wo zhe me dou zhao bu dao

hai shi dui wo lai shuo

zi chuang de shi jie cai shi zhen shi

ren dao di shen lai gan ma??
zhen shi shen lai huan zhai ma..

lishyan mingyan:
ren yi shi feng ping lang jing
tui yi bu hai kuo tian kong

bing xue jia shuang hou
zong hui yu guo tian qing

rain

2006-12-26T07:19:00.000-08:00

kena wake up by mom at 12. to da pao food. it was rainin like fark. i sheltered a lady and an old uncle. he eat my dou fu can.. e food was damn heavy. all soup stil got one big cup of drink. plus e water wet my whole leg. i cant take e heaviness sooner or ltr. but stil made it. course i must be able to make it. someone was sick today. but suffered moii naggin liao. beta le bahhss~ e part bout dad guess i'll not say much.

arcade again

2006-12-18T06:49:00.000-08:00

went tuu kovan to pei em play game.. owaes go dere. LOL. den feel like goin for bowlin.. gan lonq nv go liao nor* gaga. eat and went home.. was rainin heavily today.. hab fun tokin on e phone wit bel and all.. fell aslp aft dinner.. dono y. slept til 1 today lei. HAHA. in e end suffered a splash of cold water in my face. dad doins.. LOL. he owaes do tis to wake us up~ idiot. its cold can. LOL~

aches

2006-12-17T06:28:00.000-08:00

had e aches today. slept at arnd 4.30 am. had e aches.. perhaps didn sit properly e whole tym and crouch for veri long bahhss.. i'm busy wiit moi ting in e room.. busy makin smth.. moii eyes are almost closed at tat tym.. if i close it longer i tink i'll jus drop dead. LOL. went to aunt hse for a big feast and majong. wasn in a veri good luck. lost all $10 at first. but in e end stil win $2.1o. gave moi da gu $2. she's hapi yea.. LOL. i'm sho nice.. oh ya. got back mp4 but it went bonkers again today. i'm fucked up by it. to tink i've stayed up til 3 e previous day jus to throw in 117 songs. e aches are killin me..

not much again

2006-12-13T06:34:00.000-08:00

somehow.. i feel tat ii'm wastiin moii life away.. iits liike slp late late and do nth aftwards~ or e same routiines. ii'm gettin tired of all tat. ii don wan moii to liive a life tis way. but nth can be hlped probably. jus e simple gazin stars or sea lookin ish much of a difficult task in moi position. parents jus cant stop worryiin if i jus sneaked out agaiin. and ii won allow em to get sho worried bout moii** aww.. how fucked up.

sian diao

2006-12-12T05:10:00.000-08:00

woke up at 2 today. LOL. stayed home all day again. i packed tings up and all.. bathe hao le.. guess i'm quite suitable in short hair aft all. LOL~ its alright anw.. GAGA* become those cutie style freak. oh yesh.. forgot tuu add tat i saw moi classmates twice ytd. funi~

reborn again

2006-12-11T08:49:00.000-08:00

was damn tired. oni slp fer 6h i tink.. ytd LOL.. slp at 4 plus mahhss. woke at 10. gan sian. but dad wan bring us out sho bo bian nor. LOL.. ltr on went tuu reborn hair wit mom.. she perm. cos moi hair alot spoil le mahhss. den cut away.. and i simply hate e end result. gan cui long pia si le suan le* anw.. ren yao wang qian kan.. ming tian hui geng hao mahhss.. i love long hair and was wonderin by when wil it grow long again.. haish~

e day b4 bdae

2006-12-09T06:07:00.000-08:00

today felt much beta lerrss. LOL. probably won get shoes liao. bu hao mahss~ gaga. dinner out and all.. anw. my card ishcompleted. though it sucks. LOL. lookin for paper e whole day.. anw. jus came up from buyin tings downstairs. we jus noe its 24h. GREAT* nxt tym 4 plus go down oso can. =]

confused

2006-12-08T10:29:00.000-08:00

not a hapi day.. tats it~ shan't tok bout it much oreadi..

another tian

2006-12-06T08:36:00.000-08:00

slept til 2.30 today cos too tired lerrss. dao tou jiiu shui. yts slept at arnd 4 if moii instincts are correct. LOL. its nth anw.. hab fun doiin it. XD . made moii own spagetti and soup of e day for lunch. wit an additional grape milkyea for dessert. LOL. den watched tv and all for e rest of e day. probably jus needed rest. and i wonder wat am ii tuu do tml.. taggin behind wit sis and sheena tuu vivo do hw?? bu ke neng~ LOL. its either ii find moii own tings to get busy wit.. but i don tink dere's anythin to get moii hands on. de mo.. i jus hated sianness.. c wat am ii to do bahhss~ cloud gazin ain't a bad idea too.. =]

chalet

2006-12-05T08:17:00.000-08:00

was intendin to go watch movie tis day. til i received a call frm bel askin bout tml chalet. i was OMG. its tml.. but i went anw. met bel, she shout i shout. den hug tgt and jump.LOL.. she said she missed me. me too.. we went hougang mall to shop. bought purple hairspray and played wit it. i went to hab another ear hole too. LOL. den da ben dan si jia ping lai le!! =] pei ta go and eat. hab fun along e way too.. talked alot oso.. we went outside to smoke den.. LOL. but aft tat he go work den me and bel go meet our class. went to changi aloha tgt aft tat.. jus behind ish OCH. i got a veri bad feelin went i went in e most end de room.. but i didn stay over anw.. we talked and hab reali loads of fun.. den started preparin for bbq lerrss. evrybody veri busy. made a veri veri good fwen teacher in jus minutes. we practically talked bout evrythin and was close dao like wat. kinda scary. LOL. eat and fun.. den at nite mr tiong play catchin wit em. gan funi. while me bel and sheryl e teacher talked under e moonlight. =] went in for fruits ltr on. den bel and wee chuen fight one one. LOL. e way dey say sho funi.. i took loads of pic and videos too. e music was blastin and play here and dere.. we almost combed wee chuen when bel say she wans one one. funi gal.. i ran aft him and he came back wit a road sweepers broom. i snatch back. got cts and bruises all over anw.. den its arnd 11 lerrss. time reali flies. heng ii got moi chopper bodyguard pingping tuu send me home. bel wans me to msg her when i reach. sheryl too. =]

moii and pingping walked under e moonlight. and went to changi beach to look at e sea, feel e breeze. talked too, fun can. pingping's veri protective. =] we got e same DNA. LOL. den head over to e bus terminal.. for e last bus. XD. jus sho much to tok and hab fun bout can.. laugh non stop. idiot lahhss. =]. pingping send me to moi lift. but we missed e last LRT and bus sho walked home.. mom and dad was sho worried. dad reali angry cos i told him i alone at compass miss bus and LRT walkin home myself. and it was bout 12.30 lerrss. sowie dad.. reached home at 12.45*

I created a Slide Show! Check it out!

2006-12-05T08:13:00.000-08:00

wow

2006-11-30T06:31:00.000-08:00

woke up late today.. i mean ltr for work. but stil make it in time. abit shag today.. neng ka neng chiu. dono y.. jus for e star gaze part i tink.. sis nv tel moi wan go eat breakfast wit moi nana.. yo~ haish. sad nor. miss her lahhss si nana~

terrible

2006-11-29T06:09:00.000-08:00

didn do much e past few days sho lets forget it. oni rmb i saw my sec 1 journal while packin e books. read through.. sho last time moii life depended laughter and fwens.. without e frequet goin outs and fwens ii can jump off e roof. HAA~ i laughed at it. ke jian i'm reali dead now..

jus feelin terrible now.. not oni dere's some prob wit moii mp4. haiya.. don feel like vomitin all out rite now. probably cos i did sho somewhere else oreadi bahhss. who noes?? nobody wld alright.. F***

majong

2006-11-26T06:40:00.000-08:00

kena woke up again today.. and got e pains in e neck. rmb i sprain moii neck.. den head stil hurt abit. went tuu white sands for lunch and proceed tuu aunt hse. started playin majong. guess wat. moii shou qi gan ho today. limit twice. once zi mo de leh. kekes* mayb cos of e bang ytd bahhss~ in e end er gu owe me $12. and ii paid off mom's debts. she oso nv pay moii money when ii win can.. she win i pay lorrss can* LOL. but anw.. stil won $12 aft e whole ting..next week count again bahhss. LOL. buyin books tml..

bang head

2006-11-25T07:19:00.000-08:00

slept at 3.15 and kena woke up at 9.30.. i was like practically glued tuu e bed and stickyly peeled off. XD went tuu fernvale. sianded.. eat le breakfast jiu went tuu compass. gota return some books. sho ii borrowed black mirror and locked inside. these two were pretty nice books ii suppose. today deres tis hong xin da jiang tingy tat bugged moii off. dey were some sort of crazy bout it and wat can ii do den. pei he ta men lo. it was reali dui lian can.. F*** =P went too missha and played wit e nail polish.. ten diff colour on moi nails. wanted to try out blue and green but not enuf finger. kekes* eat le go back home and it tired moii out. fell asl and woke up for dinner outside. i practically banged my head on e sharp edge of cement wall. its directly above moii but i didn c. big impact lahhss. sprain moii neck as a result too. FUCK. tis one reali suck. deres tis blood stains on e parts where ii hit on. cry la. pain leh.. na bei chee bai~ XD

fishes

2006-11-24T06:54:00.000-08:00

sis open bacardi breezer all of e sudden. scary.. and we share e whole of it. i was like weak shit. it all seems ok at first.. den high, hot, follow by singin. haha. ma chiam ii dono how e alcohol goes. okiies. i probably ate too much durin dinner and damn bloated. in e end vomti. LOL.. who cares anw.

intend tuu go to work e nxt day but couldn wake up. LOL. c wat alcohol does. in e end rot next day.. though i cooked jus one dish for dinner. HAHA.

today went to work. though gan xin ku. wake at 4 and end at 4. lunch oso at 4pm.. stand from 9am to 1 pm. nv stop workin. didn reali eat much and was reali hungry too.today got 10 cartons of prawns to work wit. poke all arnd as usual. and e lightest ting dere ish arnd 6 kg can. ki siao. LOL. but for e short moment of lyin under e stars in e mornin.. its worth it. i love it dere. got one of e kind lectures from dad again today. LOL. my dad ish reali cute. say i now at channel 8 and he at 9.sho he must slowly switch channel. LOL. wet market ish a fun place. evrybody dere was fun.. xin ku de dang er yi qi chang ge. =] but i seriously cnt tahan evryday.

dad de kou tou chan : eh? jiao weh. AND. le da ah neh zhoi zho ni?.. =P

eunice

2006-11-22T05:25:00.000-08:00

was intendin tuu go out tml for slackin business. did mention tat tuu dad. he mo bu keng shen.. e day aft jiu treat me beta than usual~ keep sayin wan bring me here and dere.. don tink i dono. but he seems not to wan moi to go veri much. and hoped tuu satisfy moi by all tat. but fwens and parents or family make a veri significant diifference. no matter how hard he try, e gap ish stil dere. i probably wil give in. since he doesn wana.. my fridge got another jus 5% alcohol. tats good.. i can hab a bottle for myself. hais~

prawns

2006-11-22T05:04:00.000-08:00

woke up at 4 today. aft i prepare lerrss dere's stil no movement comin from dad's room. started tuu wonder y was it ltr den usual. but tat didn bother me much.. i made myself a cup of coffee and tune on e tv for some entertainment. b4 long he came out.. and e journey started again. rmb i vandalised e suntec city door and nearly made it to a police case?? went dere again today.. and nearly made moi blood boil. i scold e CCTV camera lahhss. we reached at arnd 7.20am and waited for e door which was supposed to open at 7.30. course it didn. made a few trips here and dere. paced arnd. ma chiam dua us lydat tat security. in e end e stupid manager say FORGET to open. fuck him lahhss.. made it into e tower at 8 can.. got a few malays keep starin at me at vivo city. erm.. not exactly starin. jus keep on lookin. i suppose dey didn hab much ulterior intentions. tat didn bother me much~

finished e routine and started work again. but it ended quicker than moi mind can keep up. usually work end at arnd 1 in e afternoon but today was 11. scare moi.. went tuu chompchomp opposite de roti prata shop for lunch. gan full de.. and reached home at 1. HOW FAST..

sian

2006-11-20T07:22:00.000-08:00

went to downtown east today- explorer kids. take note. its KIDS~ OMG!!! hais. find myself childish to go in wit my bro and sis. bo bian. gota look aft em sia. HAIS. sho sian nowadays. gan sian. when dere ish no jie mu. i'll feel like dyin. time pass sho slowly. its like look at e clock and c 2pm. aft veri long look again.. 2.15. when i tot it was oreadi at least an hr. gong watch finish. book goin tuu read finish. tok on phone oso sian. go out oso sian. stay home oso sian. HAIS~ didn reali noe wat tuu do oreadi. oh yesh!!~ saw moii pri sch fwen today oso. its clara. TAKE NOTE~ btw. i was like sittin tgt wit all e small children. playin wit em. all crowdin. SIA LAHHSS~ gan dui lian. cnt tink i actuali did tat kinda ting. PLUS got two guys outside laughin at me. i wana point middle finger at em lahhss.

cook

2006-11-18T23:06:00.000-08:00

hmm.. ytd was e normal stuff. but tink ii goiin bonkers liiao. was like sho damn depress for a day, and completely gan hyper fer e 2nd. LMAO~ but its fun behavin like siao. LOL. got a breezer in moii fridge. woots~ slp late these few days and woke up kinda earlie. not moii style. but hab fun cookin in e kitchen and it was damn nice lahhss. LOL. can consider guo de man chonq shi oreadi. LOL. ltr mayb yao zuo yoga oso. can relax lerrss..

sick

2006-11-17T06:14:00.000-08:00

i'm sick~ sho sick. guess ish men chu lai de illness bahhss. flu, cough. jus vomit in e afternoon. didn eat much too. but ii don tink i'm reali tat sick as i looked. jus feel sho men. come to tink of it.. i didn tok much. no needa say laugh bahhss. forgotten how tuu?? mayb.. how lonq has it been. jus went tuu yew hong hse wit sis tuu watch R45. get tuu breathe e fresh cold air. felt much beta than.. but aft reach home evrythin still e same. talked wit sis alonq e way. told her ii talked to cats at market. she jus said.. euu reali sho lonely mahhss.. say wil bring me out derrss. still love her alot. she said she loved me too..

today

2006-11-13T07:24:00.000-08:00

woke up at 4 and tot dad got work.. completely forgotten he off day. heng haven prepare yet.. and i'm awoken at 7 plus by his thunderous voice. HAHA* went back to suntec tuu settle e words tinq. gan LAME. den go hougang eat fishball noodles. dad today needa pueh alot of daiji. XIN KU NI LA!! LOL. in e end cos he win lahhss~ muakakas* back home slept til 5.30 as usual. wonder how can ii slp for such lonq period of time oso. typical moii..wake up watch show til 9 den read story book.. one day end again. tml got jie mu. thank god. LOL.

combined posts

2006-11-12T00:46:00.000-08:00

few days nv come iin lerrrs. cos hab been quiite busy bahhss~ lets start.

dono whiich day mornin when mom go market, ii sneaked out a while. HAHA. den aft tat go aunt hse cos mom gian pua. but we went to white sands before hand to eat lahhss.. went to library and saw er gu.. and bla bla..

next day tiink mornin oso go market wit mom. i'm veri filial de can. *actuali got motive de, wan buy hair dye mahhss. kekes* HAHA. den go home slack~ watched GONG lahhss. LALALA~ den me and moii sis went for e 9 pm movie of DEATNOTE at vivo city.. HAHA. first time sho late stil go out nehhss.. at first we were stil havin 2nd tots of wana go or not. PLS. its gan sian can.. but since prepare lerrss jiu anythin. but it was reali fun.. jus e two of us.. LOL. toked alonq e way.. den dono wana buy ben's and jerry anot.. 2 scoop $7 lahhss. WTH~ we bought chocolate brownie and strawberry cheesecake. MMMM~ and agreed not to tel mom. tats e fun part. wan buy wat jiu buy wat. MUAKAKAS* aft tat walk walk.. she ji siaosiao go white dog cafe. cos she off mahhss. LAME. OH YES. when queuing up e tickets were sellin fast lahhss. LOL. but we managed to get e 2nd row. and discuss whether to buy nachos of popcorn.. HAIS. sho dillema. LOL. we settled on popcorn at first. den wanted to buy nachos. HAHA. sho.. i treat lahhss.. kekes* e theatre was gan dua can.. kia si lang.. high class enuff. HAHAs. inside oso fun.. cos e chairs stick tgt.. we spread all our food and hab fun takin piics.. aft e show went out and kan hai jing. we've realised.. * I LOVE L , he sho cute!!*

cut short abit.. ytd mornin go market again. it rained mao and gou.. moi didi meimei and mama bi yu under e void deck. den she start lahhss. LALALALA!! windows nv close.. bamboo stick nv bring in.. FUCK. her voice can killl.LOL. i get e key and strolled home under e rain. and brought back umbrellas for em. i kinda enjoyed it. but.. gettin heavier can. HAHAs. reached home slack.. den check books and all. at nite jiu go out for dinner. quite a fenq shen one.. and dozed off at 9 plus i tink.. jus rmb watchin chanq jin. LOL.

today.. didn intent to wake up and hlp dad out. but it seems like he has got alot to do today. sho.. HAIS. told euu i'm filial. HAHA. i woke up at 3.30 tuu bath. one day nv bath e feelin sicks lahhss. and sis ish jus bout to slp oni. KEKES* today i off form. was tired right from e begginin. cut my own finger somemore. dad say e no blood not counted. HAHA. i say must wait.. a while more blood oozed out lahhss. den he say lydat oso not counted cos e blood must b gushin out. JI SIAO SIAO. haha~ e sharp heads keep pokin into my nails.. blood blood blood.. OH YES. mornin go suntec song huo.. ii jumbled up e words stickin on e door. " no pets, no outside food and no trolley" i made patterns.. and formed a " yes trolley" HAHA~ den afternoon e manager or wat called. say camera saw me vandalisin and wan make police report. stil demand for explanation. LOL. i tot it was kinda funni. but e adults all sho serious ii oso lan lan. kekes* tml must go down pueh lorrss. SIAN. i wanted to watch bleach de can~

holis suck

2006-11-09T07:34:00.000-08:00

HOLIDAYS suck la~ seemed sho damn lonnqq.. seriously ii tot its been a mth oreadi.. den jus realise stil hab more than a mth to go. FUCK. HAIS.. wanted to buy hair dye today. den not enuff money. slept at 1.30 am and wake at 7 tuu go breakfast wit mom. den back at 10 and slp from den til 6 pm. gan pro la.. like ii wake for sho lit hours oni.. hais..

another day

2006-11-07T07:27:00.000-08:00

onlined today.. tat day went out wiit same surname de family tuu vivo city. ben lai dad say wan watch grudge 2 de. i mean ii wan watch la!! in e end too late.. den go bugis eat bobo chacha.. gou lame derrss. reach home tired liiao go out whole day. BUT STIL tuo li bu liao any of em. as ii told moi mom. " wo yao tuo li ni men quan bu".

den today.. went tuu hlp dad again. wake at 3 plus. ben lai don feel much like goin but sui bian lahhss. ii oso nth tuu do. but it was like gan tired today compared to e previous times. rain in e mornin.. sho nice tuu slp *slp for 3 hrs er yi can*. ii cut moi finger and one big patch of skin came off.. den ii used salt and rub den wash hands in order to sha jun and don feel itchy ltr on ma.. guessed wat. its SHUANG la. haha. heck man.. i'm too tired oreadi. dozed off in dad's car as usual.. den went tuu jalan kayu to eat roti prata. its xiao dao ke lian can.. haha. but weird ting ish reali full.. reached home bath le jiu fell aslp liao.

e EMPTINESS ish gettin UNBEARABLE * spelling thanks to qin ai de laogong >.< *

days

2006-11-02T07:41:00.000-08:00

these few days bu shi at dad workiin place work.. jiiu shi stay at home rot. nth much. liife was like, fuck la. stop here first. gtg.. though haven finish. continue next tym lerrss..

cut prawn

2006-10-29T07:19:00.000-08:00

went tuu slp at arnd 12. but wonder wat tm i doze off. oni noe ii woke up at 4am. was like sho sacred cnt wake up can.. today dad ltr den wake up, i took my tym to get prepared. aft tat jiu take dad car go dou feng. mornin not much ting for me to do. ban alot of tings oni lo. don xiao kan those boxes of tings k. e smallest one 5 kg can. load finish le jiu go song huo oreadi.. went to alot of places. aft i wake up de 2 hrs ish oreadi sho tired la. my eyes ma chiam cnt open liao.haha. when reach e wet market again was oreadi 8plus 9. i went to hab my breakfast, eat dou jiang you tiao. haha and chwee kueh plus kopi shio. HAHa. den start work le. cut prawns lo. cut until 12.30 can.. non-stop de. ma chiam won finish lydat. nv even get e chance to sit down.. TIRED. e sharp heads poke into my hands can.. plus those muddy water. one poked into my finger nail dere can. gan tia sia. got blood.. den was sho sticky. gaga* den i change finger.. in e end poke my middle finger. haha. fucked up. must cut fast ma. whole of 10 big boxes plus small prawns la.can ti hui e xin ku-ness fully.. but seriously dad was sho much xin ku than me. he did sho much more.. hmm. my hair all stick tgt lo. lol. tink ish e prawn de juice ba.. haha "superhard gel" can. reali ish unseparable.. one ting veri funi. i bought xtra dao hueh zui for dad and tel him 50 cents oni. he said 50 cents not money ah. den in a while he he accidentally drop e whole bag on my leg la. haha. scary.. yea. 50 cents not money. HAHA. e prawns all swimming in dao hueh pool. lol. was reali tired, smelly and sticky plus itchy but fun. can hlp dad out ma. i was tinkin if i not dere how much more work he must do la. i dozed off in his car when he goin song huo in e afternoon. dad had his lunch at 3 plus 4. HAIS.. went home and had a long bath.. -kena fish teeth poke la. right in my little toe can. itchy-

MP3

2006-10-27T08:14:00.000-07:00

today wake up gan tired. dono y.. slp late?? mayb. den go CP wit mom and sis. eat yoshi.. ben lai wan eat pizza de.. but too ex la. sis buy a pants for her work. its sho ex nor. waste of money.. stil need make short cos leg too short.. saw kailin and joanna at MC oso. hou lai jiu go hougang buy MP4. moi money okiies.. all these days i work de money.. e cost ish $119 but uncle give us $110. mom stil short of $2 though.. say tml den return. in e end no money buy school shoes and dinner.LOL. go back rest a while jiu go out buy dinner again.. tml dono wan go hlp dad not. abit sian.. hais. I MISS 2I can..

last day

2006-10-26T11:01:00.000-07:00

last day of sch. seemed normal like " tml stil got sch" days.. not intendin tuu come de. but needa get report book. our class prepared a powerpoint slide. it was a fun one, but sad one too. we play dai ti la. and whole lot more. sian liao play money oso. haha. we're gambling hao bu hao. not much of a day. jus a veri weird mixture of complex feelings again.. i tot i didn give a damn bout e class. my class. nth bothered me. but last day le.. alot tat were sleepin surfaced again. "memories" la. from e first day i came til now. alot alot. tats weird though. alot had been forgotten. suddenly reali she bu de our family. hugged xu lao shi. she ask me guai yi dian, ting hua. ta bu zai jiao shu le. i tel her ni shi ge hao lao shi. and tats reali zai jian lo. sch end le. me and bel do e "pao pao cha" hug. and "long distance" hug. xiang qi hao duo shi can.. say ming nian jian and all. hais. ber made me cry la. she hug me and cry, say don wan separate. life has to go on and tis ish oni a small part of wat's comin along ba..

slacked

2006-10-25T08:26:00.000-07:00

mornin meet si laogong go eat breakfast at 5.30 am. sho siian. in e end earlie mornin tio mom gan. go dere tio "laogong" say oso. sianded. LOL. reach plaza eat wit peggy, wei jun and his bro. eat til ii wan vomiit. den go sch wiit peggy. go dere watch movie, play daiti, listen tuu MP3. but ii was sho tiired can.. slept a liitle. aft recess jiiu go out sch opposiite find lionel and weijun. den peggy came. she go weijun hse slp. LOL. den ii go lionel hse slack. siit sit here sit sit dere. den go home slp lorrss. TV spoil, wan watch oso cnt. den call ppl tok nor. den nua at home tiil nite. jus got tuu noe i'm in 3G. others not imp le bahhss. tml gettin report book le. hais.. unspeakable and complicated mixed feelings~

go out wit er gu

2006-10-24T08:38:00.000-07:00

today woke up at arnd 9 plus lydat. den go out meet moii er gu and co. at tampines de -HANS-. ate alot. but verii liitle ppl. weird fer such PUBLIC holis.. we got bout 10 ppl dere lahhss. makiin such a diin siia. den walk walk arnd. was like go some place den must stop and check fer e heads lahhss. here lost dere lost.. had much fun. quiite a day bahhss.. alriight gtg lerrss.

fuckin guy

2006-10-23T09:09:00.000-07:00

today went to payar lebar de jiu huang miao pray.. woke up at 1 but come back slp tiil niite.. wonder wats e prob wiit moii. haha* stiil slp tiil sho deep. dream of shuai ge. muakakas* den jus now got a fuckin guy named khong in moii msn come tok to me. say wat hiis cock itchy wan me scratch. wan sex wiit moii. FUCK. wan me make hiis cock harder. say masterbed beta than puttin hiis cock into me. FUCK. aft tat he change his DP into last tym me and regina take de piic.. who e hell ish "he". I WANA FIND OUT. jus wan his friendster. i'm definite tat he add me from dere. but its jus too hard.. ANYBODY CAN HELP??

normal

2006-10-22T09:13:00.000-07:00

wow~ i'm siick today. cool man.. flu and eye irritation. sianded.. did nth much too. jus hope tuu pon diiao e two days tiis week soon.. went tuu aunt hse as usual. c dey play majonnq lorrss. ii mei you fen siia. siian~ next tym ii got place den call moii mahhss. anyway, siian lahhss. goiin tuu rot again tml. SOMEBODY ENTERTAIN MOI LA~

normal day

2006-10-21T10:51:00.000-07:00

like evry other day.. mornin~ i mean afternoon i wake up jiu go out eat. den rent a DVD called 'boogeyman' it sucks la.. "most scariest movie-ever" alright.. like alot. haha. den go changi at nite. to pray fer deepavali. haha.. aft tat jiu come home lerrss. hao siian wor!! fuck* gota pon sch..

pon sch??

2006-10-20T09:02:00.000-07:00

haiiya.. today gan siian derrss. play tarot in e begiininq. den watch movie. funni show la <> nv watch fiinish jiu go out class cos seang fiind me. chat chat slack slack, tok wif elaiine oso. den hungry wan go eat.. iish 10 plus 11 liiao bahhss. ben laii xiianq guai yi dian eat in canteen but too late liiao. today graduation ceremony rite?? haia.. too bad lorrss. sho go next door coffee shop eat wiif jaz. eat le slack a whiile jiu go back sch lahhss. go back play play oso siian~ whole day do nth much lahhss.. siian.

pon class?

2006-10-18T02:00:00.000-07:00

tiis few days owaes nv post lahhs. hahas. okiies lets start from ytd. ytd whole day iin sch rot lorrrs. den decide to go down duriin recess. went down buy milo den ii knock peter. scare hiim lahhss. kekes* he chua tio dono who knock him suddenly. LOL. he go sch opposite de block smoke. den kina come in a moment.. ii was like sho sian nor. of course ii veri guai nv touch. anyway promise kina le mahhss. LOL. haiya she stil ah neh kuan wiit aiai. sad case.. den ii was like go two recess in a day without eatin. rot.. ii applyin 4 sch leave anyway. go dere oso gam lan. today ii smarter. whole day listen to MP3.. kekes* tiio PS by moii hen hao de aiai. cool.. I WAN BREAKFAST LAHHS.. nobody wiilin tuu go siia.. sad case. LOL.

work..

2006-10-15T10:51:00.000-07:00

woo~ reached home at 12 plus. work le whole day gan tired. dono wat day siia. keep on gettin scoldin. wat makes moi irritated ish "nong settin!" "y make settin. bu yao nong!" "y nv make.. kuai dian!" den i was like.. "dao di yao nong hai shi bu yao nong!" lol.. today hun yan again. sianded.. take de chocolate oso cnt eat. cos not up to age.. sianded. leg breakin.. anyway today one of e shuai shuai worker like got prob. probably first day i see him keep on shoot him sho today he like eat wrong medicine owaes say moi. haha.. kam gong.

snaek out?

2006-10-14T09:46:00.000-07:00

ytd nite around 12 plus sneak out.. jus wana go buy ting eat. hungry ma. n walk around downstairs. not wit any of my family okiies.. but rite downstair jiu saw sis. gan suay. she CB ask me go up. i stayed downstair aft she went up. she tinks i'll follow her?? a while more mom come down. i hide one corner. i quarrel wit her le she went up. tinkin i'll follow oso?? fat hope. for some reasons i jus don wana go up again. for e consequences? i don care anymore. i sat downstairs. mom stare stare stare. i reali gan fucked up oreadi. in e end i went up. stil unwillin to go in though. i stand outside. stare downstairs. i can jump if i stared longer. sis shout. " why MUST euu go 7-11 n guy ting eat" i wana say. "its not MUST but i jus wana go out on my own. buy ting a while jiu hao. buy ting oni." but i didn speak a word. i went in room n blast e "dono y in my room de MP3 " fainty heard mom n sis shoutin n quarrellin. den " old habits returned " for today.. tink my mouth wil rot. cos wo jiang bu dao yi liang ju hua. smiles faded too. wonder how long can i hold on to tis. til then.. i dono wat wil i do. jump from e window?? i dono.. got a few options today. mornin cnt go out. at nite sneak out. at nite cnt sneak out. i pon sch oso go out. go in home?? at least can go out..

exams over

2006-10-13T00:28:00.000-07:00

woo~ exams over la.. though not reali feelin happi but ish stil smth tuu b hapi abt. hahas.now its time tuu choose courses. gan luan siia. catch no balls oso. hack la~ next week gettin back results le. sho fast.. hahas* its tym tuu start work anyway. my daiji postpone again. to 18th. kekes* now got fight ii oso hapi lahhs. HAO SIAN WOR~

sianded

2006-10-06T09:13:00.000-07:00

wow~ from tat day onwards i'll hab someone tuu fetch moi home from sch immediately.. good thing bad thing?? who cares. lols. getting " si ba " oreadii. sian sian and even more sian.. nth much these few days. glad tat peter meii shii lerrss. got my good luck hug sure tide over all difficulties la. haha. I WAN PLAY SPARKLES!!! now exams stil on.. hais* but goin work tml bahhss. tuu xiao mo shi jian. type tiil here lerrss. cya everybody~

come down sch

2006-10-02T02:59:00.000-07:00

woo~ today woke up at 8. N ii am supposed tuu meet peter at 7 fer farewell party. he waited fer half an hour. am damn guilty man.. but stil managed tuu c him in sch. tok tok wit his lawyer n e security uncle. tgt wit a "goodbye hug". nth much today actuali. recess eat wiit kina.. den aft sch whole family come. lols. ma chiam picnic.. tok tok tok. n e conclusion ish ii kena ground again. hahas. hack man.. now aft sch oso cnt go home myself liiao.. FUCK. got a new haircut ytd.. hahas.

probs?

2006-09-29T09:50:00.000-07:00

today was quite a busy day. reach sch oni start lookin fer ppl. alot of ppl tuu look for. hab a veri long chat wit mdn yeo too. missed moi recess. den go 2nd recess. moi aiai dey all can cek ark more derrss. hmm.. den brought my noodles upstairs. on e way stopped by 2 teachers. den we run up e stairs but saw mdn yeo. suay.. but veri fun nahhss. aft sch sis come fetch me. we went 2 delifrance. chat fer hours den go shoppin. belbel sho cute.. I LOVE EUU!! den saw leroy sista dey all.. dono 14 oct how. hais. its moi ting. but i reali dono if i can make it. don tink i can le. but wat else can i do.. reali veri wu nai. i MUST go but CANT go. alot of ppl pueh down ready. wat if ii cnt siia. ltr hai em kena scold. hais. at nite mom find me tok. she started light beating wit a pillow. she tok tok den cried. say why cant ii jus listen to em. 2nd tym, oso gek xim cry. 3rd tym, she say she stil wan c me go university de. cried. find her sho cute suddenly. but c her lydat.. i oso gek xim. cfm goin counsellin liao. wonder who wil ii c dere..

papa

2006-09-29T09:41:00.000-07:00

tat day 3 plus 4 reach home. step in hse baogong chiong out. shout shout shout. angry dao keep shiverin. den start tuu ask evrytime wit who! go do wat! n bla bla bla.. i go put tings down, he grab my arm n smash me in e wall. den start askin me to rite down all their names n contact num. say wan go find em. i stand dere n start tinkin of numbers. but of course ii don rmb. tel him he oso say ii bluff him. sua lorrss. den suddenly ii cnt hear. cnt see. den ii close moi eyes. stil tinkin of nums. when ii heard moi grandmama shakin me ask me wake up. i was lyin on e floor. i lie dere n pick up the pen tat ii was stil holdin. stil tinkin of nums.weird. aft tat ii realised ii jus fainted. veri long ting anyway.. don wan tok bout it. anyway moi papa mon comin down sch. wan tel principle fer me tuu quit sch. hp oso confiscated. cool man.. one more ting. mentos box discovered too. cool..

continue

2006-09-25T02:46:00.000-07:00

its 5.45 now. reached home long ago. jiie oso at home lerrss. now dey demand fer moi tuu go down. ahlam called n say ii must go down "ta men yao ni". ish wat he said. stil ask if my hse downstair can not. i say ii reach home le cnt go down. told him tml can mahhss?? aft sch. he ish now tryin tuu help moi speak a word bahhss. tink tml it ish. stil waitin fer his call.. now ish ang soon tong VS siao ppl. hais. HOW E HELL BECAME SUCH A GRAVE MATTER. n ii am e key person. now ii reali damn luan. tis one cal say tis. tat one cal say tat. kina ish such a busy gal gota rush here n rush dere..

throwin stones..

2006-09-25T01:28:00.000-07:00

childish, small small ting make til sho big. stil say ish ii pom big one. stil call ppl down, gam lan. idiot gal slap moi somemore. bo dai bo ji slap me. heng jiie here, help moi tuu e end. EUU R THE BEST JIIE!! I LOVE EUU!! mr neo saved e day again. i didn wana fight but seems to not hab a choice. at tis tym mr neo came. 2nd tym he save me. den i told him, wit kina wat happened. e other sch ppl gam li hai peng weh. he send me home aft tat. otherwise don tink ii can make it back. stil gota trouble jiie's cousins, reali am guilty lerrss. kina say she shd hab known sooner. hais. its a veri long story. bout e throw stone gan childish ting tuu e msn ting. wat dey wan ish fight oni. i told kina if reali bo bian ii bia wit her. but, she don allow bahhss. don wan moi get hurt. hais. its 5 now, and dey r stil tokin bout it. now kina hab tuu say all over again tuu her cousins. wonder how isit goiin. she oreadi hab enuff probs tuu worrie bout, n now ii'm addin on tuu it. daniel dey all can oni pat moi head. encouragement?? boiboi can oni tel me i veri ke lian.. now chee bai got siao de ren help moi oso. kenneth say if ltr got ting jus say ii his gan mei. now da bor oso chap?? lame nor make til sho big. kina went home 2 change. she'll update me tonite. tis ting last from aft sch til now. 5.30. n ah lam oreadi dere oso. WAT E HELL ISH HAPPENIN. i'll oni get tuu noe tonight aft kina reach home. she keep askin me not tuu worriie. tink wil continue til tml bahhss. by den, i'll b dere too. tuu pueh daiji. i'll get prepared. no mtater wat it ish tat lies ahead. i go in hospital oso biia my way out. chee bai make til ma chiam all my fault.

tired

2006-09-23T07:47:00.000-07:00

fucked up sch.. N sch ppl. jus wish tuu run from it forever. but how can ii do tat. wow.. i'm gettin tired. how can ii stand livin lydat. n ppl are owaes sayin "i am here fer euu" liers..

hot

2006-09-23T07:35:00.000-07:00

WOW!! I'M SHO DAMN HOT NOW.. COS MOI MSN NICK PUT "EUU WU JI THROW, DO IT IN MOI FACE" DEN SOME BITCH JIIU PUT "EUU WU JI YTD JIIU WIIL AT DERE CUM CONFRONT US LERRSS.. DON NEED COR PPL DERRSS.." FUCK!!

lonely

2006-09-22T06:22:00.000-07:00

i wonder how, i wonder why, i jus feel lonely all of e sudden. as if e whole world there's oni moi around.. or is it i'm livin in moi own world?? i hate it tuu b tat way..

macritchie reservoir

2006-09-22T05:15:00.000-07:00

today went tuu gan sian de reservoir walk one round. LAME. ben lai oreadi don feel lyk goin lerrss. END UP SEEIN SOME BITCHES. EUU WU JI THROW, THROW IT IN MOI FACE. DON DO IT BEHIND MOI BACK AND ACT AS IF NTH HAPPEN EUU STUPID BITCH. CHILDISH PPL. I DON WANA GIVE A DAMN BOUT EUU ALL SHO STOP SHOWIN ME ATTITUDE. THROW STONE AND HIT MOI HEAD SOMEMORE. EUU NOE WHO EUU R OKIIES. GO FUCK YER MOTHER ASS. BUAY SONG ME, COME TIO ME. EUU WAN ONE ON ONE. I'M OWAES PREPARED. NA BEI CHEE BAI..

cig case

2006-09-21T05:38:00.000-07:00

mom found moii ciig case agaiin. aww.. sian. hmm.. 2nd tym lerrss. reali siian diao. she jus now kaopei me. ma chiiam gan hot. fiirst tym she keep to herself. nv tel dad. tiis tym.. tink she wil tel bahhss. me n moii dad now veri good terms. verii diif cai sho good derrss. i oso dono.. don lydat mahhss.. haven exams jiiu go gals home. haiis. n.. she took moii hp agaiin. ARHHSS!!

new day??

2006-09-21T05:27:00.000-07:00

brand new blog?? nope.. ediit derrss. though haven complete. i'm a noob at computers. one tiing iish, ii deleted all of moii past postiings. iits a tough job. too many lerrss. let bygones be bygones bahhss. wanted tuu start tiis agaiin. can vomiit evrythiin here. memoriies wiil stay. let iit b forgotten iif iit has tuu..